hey folks...was talking to an friend on skype who's a jw.
she mentioned that she no longer has the zeal to do fs and meetings ect...if a jw confided in you, how would you handle it without rasing suspisions whilst at the same same trying to get them to think or even plant a few seeds?.
she says once she leaves the kh, she doesn't feel the desire to do anything spiritual and that her fs time has reduced...she also told me that she feels "lazy" in her worship to jehovah.. thanks.
Hi Kool Jo,
I am not familiar with your status right now. Assuming this person believes you are an active JW, maybe you could reassure her that her feelings are natural. Tell her that you've felt that way before. Let her know it is safe to confide in you. Get the soil ready, before you try to plant any seeds. You don't want to risk setting off the apostate alarm.
when we were in we were often read that scripture and told we should work hard at putting on the new personality, which in wt speak meant their cult personality, nothing like the person of christ.. since leaving it has become necessary for us to make deep internal changes, to our worldview, to our emotions, and to our actions.. we have had to change from being controlled in all these areas by the wt cult, to forming our own new personality.. for born-ins like me this is really quite a task, we do not have a "pre-cult" personality to "recover".
but even for converts, there is stilll this work to do, before you joined you may have been racist, homophobic, or perhaps a thief, or immoral in some other way, surely you do not wish to "recover" those aspects of your original personality ?so you too have to "put on" a new one.. how are we all doing with this ?
i know that for me i feel it is still a work in progress, i need to work on certain things that are the result of my being in the jw/wt scam for all those decades, and some things that are a part of my natural personality which are not desireable as traits, laziness for example, and i am the arch-procrastinator, not good.. how do you guys feel you are doing since leaving ?.
I was never a JW, but I can tell you I have many personalities. Every time I've tries to define myself, I have ended up with even more questions.
Different situations call for the use of different skills and different perspectives. We are all human, and all different.
Having spent your whole life being forced to fit a cookie-cutter prototype persona, is tragic. You were very brave to post this question. Thanks for bringing it up.
I would suggest that we are all on our own path, and that we are all growing and developing our "selves" as we go. JW's have an extra challenge, when they leave the security and insulation of the organization. I can tell you that I have always struggled to figure out exactly "where" I fit into the world, and that the answer to that question actually keeps changing! Human life is complicated, and I don't know anyone who has had a perfect definition of "who" or "why" they are.
Thanks for asking this question. I am curious to see what response people have.
Welcome to the world of possibilities! Live, love, enjoy and (most importantly) forgive yourself and others.
this is a follow-up from the recent thread from adjustments, addressing the mind control and manipulation the wts uses to threaten the jw's into unquestioning submission.. is there any statemtent they could make, that people would not question?
honestly, if you read their study articles, it is unbelievable what the people will listen to, swallow as "truth," and then regurgitate to others, as if it has always been their belief.
we visited a local kh for the september 8 & 15 lessons on new light.
This is a follow-up from the recent thread from ADJUSTMENTS, addressing the mind control and manipulation the WTS uses to threaten the JW's into unquestioning submission.
Is there any statemtent they could make, that people would not question? Honestly, if you read their study articles, it is unbelievable what the people will listen to, swallow as "truth," and then regurgitate to others, as if it has always been their belief.
We visited a local KH for the September 8 & 15 lessons on new light. The reader on stage was shifting in his chair, as if he was getting ready to jump up for some reason. The repetition of phrases like, "jehovah will unite us" and "we must stick together on this," was blatant and elicited no reaction from the audience.
Seriously, is it even possible at this point, for the WTS to do or say anything wrong? I can see people getting ready to follow instructions, and they probably won't even get any resistance.
the recent wt states : if you don't follow, obey and listen to every word we say, and decide to change on a whim, you will be dfed and not allowed to see your family and friends!!!
we dont care if we are wrong because we will just say the light is getting brighter and not apologize, and if you don't think the light is getting brighter you will be dfed, even if it comes out years later that you were right and we were wrong you will still be dfed!!!
that's because we are just evil men not inspired by god but inspired by our own selfish hearts!!!
And the saddest fact of the matter, is that if they did publish these statements, they would be gobbled up as "new light." What a relief it would be for people, to finally have thing stately with honesty and clarity.
the recent wt states : if you don't follow, obey and listen to every word we say, and decide to change on a whim, you will be dfed and not allowed to see your family and friends!!!
we dont care if we are wrong because we will just say the light is getting brighter and not apologize, and if you don't think the light is getting brighter you will be dfed, even if it comes out years later that you were right and we were wrong you will still be dfed!!!
that's because we are just evil men not inspired by god but inspired by our own selfish hearts!!!
My mother has told me she is confused, and "maybe I shouldn't have gone ahead with getting baptized." (No response from her, when I asked if she thought others were also confused, or are you too scared to ask?)
My father recently visited and repeated the same statement 3 times: "They are smarter than me."
The whole program from the WTS is based on confusion and blind obedience to those who supposedly "know better" than you, since you will never understand their articles and prophecies. (See July 15, 2013 Watchtower study edition for just one recent example).
The true nature of this organization is so clear to any thinking person who will take the time to pay attention.
They have used subliminal language, repetition of trigger words, fear tactics and false promises to lull my parents into numb submission. It is heartbreaking to watch this happen to them, and I hate to think of them giving their last good years to serving the organization.
I am not losing hope that my family could wake up someday and reverse this very bad decision they made. The question remains in the minds of their children: Will they realize that they left true family love behind, to replace it with conditional love from "brothers" who will drop you like a hot potato, if you show even a sign that you still use your brain for something besides underlining the words of the Watchtower lesson?
Your wording was much more straightforward and to the point, than any WT lesson I ever saw. You should apply to serve on Jehovah's writing department! I'm sure they don't want all their sheep to be confused all the time. The WT could definitely use an overhaul.
http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/wp20091101/spouse-special-needs/.
an article if a marriage partner has a chronic health issue.
no - did not mention something like - 'just read the bible & you'll feel better.
SFPW: I can relate quite a few personal experiences and those of other elders and other JWs that have assisted disabled and elderly JWs.
Please do relate some of these experiences! I am losing hope that a single JW actually loves anyone.
I suspect that compassion for others has been removed from the list of acceptable behaviors.
(P.S: Are you an elder?)
http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/wp20091101/spouse-special-needs/.
an article if a marriage partner has a chronic health issue.
no - did not mention something like - 'just read the bible & you'll feel better.
SFPW: You made some good points, and I always appreciate your comments. I read your opinion and experience with great interest.
It should also be mentioned that the primary responsibility of taking care of such ones rests with relatives be it spouse, children, siblings, etc..
This point is particularly interesting to me. What option should a faithful JW choose, if they are in genuine need of care or financial assistance, but are not getting the help they need from the brothers and sisters at the KH? Should they contact their apostate relatives, or turn to the great harlot of Babylon, when times get desperate?
As mentioned in other replies in this thread, assistance and love for brothers in the congregation, are only administered to those who are serving and able to attend faithfully. You have also suggested that theocratic efforts should take precedence over anything else. Does this include the care of your own family?
Referring to another conversation we were having, about the "spiritual health" being tracked by time cards, I'm guessing that their monthly reports will have some affect on those in need.
You suggested that the time cards are used to keep track of the health and wellness of the brothers and sisters. For some reason, I took that to mean that help was given to those who were struggling. What kind of help would you give to someone whose hours and service reports were lacking, due to caring for a disabled or sick loved one?
It almost sounds like the love for brothers is conditional on service. The members are constantly pushed to do more and more work for the organizational goals. Once they are used up, they are left to fend for themselves. This sounds particularly harsh to me. I see churches and Christian people out in the freezing cold, helping the needy, feeding the hungry and housing the homeless, all while spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ... Helping people who have lived in the darkest corners of society, some who never come to repentance, yet they are given so much love and kindness without regret.
To hear these stories of faithful JW's, who spent their entire lives sacrificing and serving the organization that claims to be the one true religion, left to rot in the cold by their own brothers and sisters, I find this very sad. I have seriously considered joining this organization, but simple accounts like these are proof that the WTS is not following Christ's commands.
How very sad. When you become a JW, you are forced to make the choice... The JW's are now your "family." ... Until you are no longer useful.
browsing social media and all the pictures of jw friends out in the freezing cold this morning.
the captions read "service despite the snow.
" others take pictures of the temperature display on their car showing single digit temps.
The internet and social media is going to erode the power the society has over these young people, and it will happen publicly, for all to view.
they are arriving this evening at around 9:30 so when i went to pick up my daughter from my parents house after work i was ushered out sharpish as my mum is still cleaning the house and preparing.
ironing bedding, re-hanging curtains after getting them dry cleaned etc.
nuts!.
I have a 5 and 7 year old, and they fully comprehend what is going on with my JW parents. Sadly for them, they never got a Christmas with grandparents. My daughter's kids, who are now forced to be JW's, DO remember birthday parties and our big family Christmas gatherings. That ended 5 years ago.
We are making our own memories with our children now. I still mourn for the fun and memories that could have been, but my kids are too full of joy and innocence. We are having a wonderful time this year, decorating with more Christmas lights than ever, wrapping presents, making treats and playing Christmas music. These are memories like I made with my mom as a child. Too bad she has to miss it this time around.
could this be the home run swing when it comes to waking up a spouse?
could it work?
yesterday i was checking out this website http://howcultswork.com/.
JW's are not a cult. Just ask them.
If they do see the connection, they might ask themselves, "Are cults really a BAD thing?"
